Don’t do it

Hey I was under the weather and I wasn’t getting better so I went to get a physical check

And when I went to the doc it was a heck of a shock, he told me boy you are a miserable wreck.

He said your liver’s all swollen and your stomach’s got a hole in it from drinkin too much for too long.

And there’s a good indication you’ve got bad circulation cause your blood pressure almost gone

And you got no reflexes in your solar plexus when I tap you on the top of your knee.

He said your pulse ain’t steady and your lungs getting ready to collapse every time that you breathe.

And at the rate you’re goin all the tests are showin; boy you’ll never live to get old.

But I came up with a plan to make you healthy again, but boy you gotta do what you’re told.

That’s when he told me

Chorus

If you dig it don’t do it

And if you like it better leave it alone

And if it’s too much fun that outta clue you son

That you’re probably doing something that wrong

And I’m surprised at you and all the things you do

Boy cause that ain’t what your body is for

And if you think its bad so far wait til’ after this guitar

Cause the doctor said a whole lot more

Solo

He told me cut out your boozing, quit them drugs you been using and don’t be smoking no cigarettes.

And you know lovin a stranger nowadays boy, man is just like playin Russian roulette.

And get the grease out your diet, better broil it don’t fry it and don’t you eat no more Bar-B-Que.

I wouldn’t tell you no lie, take this rule and apply. Now, son listen to what you better do.

Chorus

If you dig it don’t do it

And if you like it better leave it alone

And if it’s too much fun that outta clue you son

That you’re probably doing something that wrong

And if it’s too good to you well don’t let it fool you

Cause you’re playin in the danger zone

And I kept waitin and waitin for the man to finish, but the sucker just went on and on.

Solo

And then he told me cut out all sweets and don’t be cramping your feet in them pointed-toe Italian shoes.

And he said boy lookie here you gonna damage your ears playin them loud rockin rhythm and blues.

And if a rabbit don’t eat it buddy you don’t need it, that’s the rules on your new menu

You better get you a pen I ain’t gonna say it again cause there’s a whole lot more that you need to do.

You need to lose some weight; you need to stand up straight, boy your posture is a terrible disgrace.

You need to suck in your gut; you need to tuck in your butt; you need to clear them zits up off of your face.

Chorus

If you dig it don’t do it

And if you like it better leave it alone

And if it’s too much fun that outta clue you son

That you’re probably doing something that wrong

And if it’s too good to you well don’t let it fool you

Cause you’re playin in the danger zone

And I kept waitin and waitin for the man to finish, but the sucker just went on and on….. on and on…. and on…..and on….. and on.